10 years clean and sober

October 29, 2010
10 years clean and sober

Today marks a milestone in my life. It was 10 years ago today that I had my last drink, my last drug, and my last Jail booking. Prior to that, I spent a lifetime seeking that next drink or drug, many times in jails, prisons and institutions. That journey saw me having negative impacts on everything and everyone I came in contact with. Today I am a different person, seeing the positive things in life, doing my best to help others, myself and family.

It took a long recovery program to get this addict clean and sober. I was “out there” for over 35 years, so it took 2+ years in programs and supervised recovery to get here (recovery).

In 1992, I found myself “walking” the “yard” in San Quentin State Prison. That in itself was a bad thing, but to make things worse, I was walking the yard with my 19 year old son. It was a joke in the prison, the “family affair” in prison. Yea, we laughed about it, but deep down, it was the ultimate degradation. My journey in the prison system continued until 2000, Oct. 29th, the end of a life of addiction and the beginning of a new life in recovery.

My “out there” years had taken everything about me, away. My family, wife, all material objects, my dignity and freedom.

I started my addiction at an early age, so as time went by in my life, I thought what I was doing was normal. I was so caught up in that life that I didn’t realize that life was passing me by and I didn’t have a clue what was really happening in the world about me.

As time passes in recovery, I look back at all the wasted time in my life and wished I could set the clock back. We all know that isn’t possible, so I have to accept that, and move forward in the now.

My early recovery after incarceration and the programs were spent attending many AA and NA meetings. I got into online recovery in 2004 and I’m sure that it had an impact on my staying clean and sober. I won’t go into detail on that at this time, just enough to say thank you to all those that I’ve come into contact online since. It’s given me responsibility, daily involvement in recovery and a whole lot of friends throughout the world.

I live life on life’s terms today, accepting the good with the bad. I do know that whatever negative things happen in my life, a drink or drug will not help solve anything. It can only make things worse. Dealing with the negative, clean and sober, gives me the opportunity to either, make better, solve, or accept the situation at hand. I wish I could say that everything is great, but I can only say that it is better. I accept that where I’m at today, is where I am, and probably where I should be. That doesn’t stop me from striving to be better though, and that is what I do today.

For those still “out there”, give yourself a break from your addiction or drinking and see what life is waiting to give to you. Try it………. You’ll like it, lol. If you don’t, you can go back to that life of misery.

Thanks to everyone that posted congrats to me, and thanks to all the emails I received from around the world today. My inbox has about 100 or so emails from folks in recovery. It’s nice to see positives things today and not the negatives that I lived most of my life. I have much more to say, but for now, I’ll leave it like this.

Have a great day everyone!!!

Milkman Mike
DOS 10-29-00